I don’t know about you but for me, transitions are the worst. They’re equally full of heartfelt goodbyes and uncomfortable hellos. For me, summer is always a time of transitions as I think about how much I’ll miss my students who are moving on to a new grade level or going off to college. I convince myself that the next batch of students will never be as good, as warm, as close. Then I have all this time on my hands. So I put my head down and work on TPT resources. And now I’m coming up for air, ready to transition to the next phase of summer: working on my unit plans, ordering supplies, thinking about first day of school activities. Meanwhile, we moved this past weekend. We now have an elderly roommate. So many transitions.
Emotionally, I always start off okay. I have so many things to distract my mind as I unpack, decorate, or work on my store. But when I pause, when I relax, when I create space, in come the emotions: sad, happy, grateful, uncomfortable, annoyed, angry, anxious, fearful.
And where is God? He feels distant, though I know His spirit dwells inside of me. Literally. So I confess to Him my feelings. I don’t get answers right away. And though that can be frustrating, if I take a moment, I can choose to look back on all the ways He has come through for me and others even in the last month. He’s there. He’s faithful. When God feels distant, it’s because I tried to move away from Him. And it’s time to come home.
He is my stability even when I’m hurting or facing the unknown. I tend to be like the Israelites wandering around the wilderness, angry and complaining against the God who just delivered them out of slavery and feeds them from the heavens each day. And to that hardness of heart, God’s word says “For if we are faithful to the end, trusting God just as firmly as when we first believed, we will share in all that belongs to Christ” (Hebrews 3:14). All that belongs to Christ?! Are you kidding me?! If that doesn’t humble my soul then nothing will. We are asked to do a small, yet hard thing: trust God. Believe Him. Beyond our negative thoughts and feelings, trust in Him. And in return, we share in everything that belongs to Christ- the Son of God who sits at His right hand.
Jesus has already done all the heavy lifting for me. So now I believe, trust, submit. He will deliver. Even when I’m uncomfortable and feeling all the feelings. He is bigger than my feelings and my fears. He is God. And I will share in everything that belongs to Him.